Road Rage, and the third option

Category : Changing perspective, Healing your body, Inspiration, New rules, Transforming your relationships

One of the most clear examples of anger out of control is in the case of road rage.

Picture the scenario: a person cuts you off as you are driving on the highway. You look over at them and they shoot you a nasty look. Then escalates to them flipping you the bird. You are thinking, what is going on here? He speeds off and you are left shaking your head and stewing over the fate of humanity, or worse.

Then a few miles later you pull over at the rest stop and go in. As you are walking toward the bathroom you see the person waiting in the Starbucks line.

Now, what are your options? Our society has evolved to really steer us to one of two options. The first and probably most common is to just ignore the person. Fear of them having a gun or being violent takes over and we swallow any emotion we have and we move on.

The second option is to approach them and say something that gets stuff off our chest. “Hey, how about toning it down out there, you are going to kill someone being reckless like that!”

What about a third option? The one where we walk up to the person, look them in the eye and calmly say, “I saw that you were upset out on the highway, I know it gets kind of hectic out there, I wanted to see if you were OK?” If the third option is used with sincerity, eye contact, and a composed demeanor, can we see how it could diffuse tense situations and make the world a better place?

Would love to hear your comments and idea’s around this.

Healing vs. Curing

Category : Healing your body

Here is my mentor Tom Monte’s explanation of the difference between Healing and Curing:


There is a fundamental difference between curing, which is the work done by medical doctors, and healing, done primarily by practitioners of complementary medicine.

Medical doctors discover the presence of disease by detecting the presence of certain signs and symptoms. Once an illness is found, doctors attempt to cure it by eliminating those signs and symptoms, usually through the use of pharmaceutical drugs, surgery, or radiation treatments. Drugs are used, for example, to relieve arthritis pain, or lower high blood pressure, or treat chronic stomach distress.

Though the symptoms and signs of an illness may be eliminated, the underlying cause of the disorder — as well as the behaviors that contribute to the disease — are largely unchanged. The person may be said to be cured of headache, or high blood pressure, but the causes of both disorders remain unchanged.

Curing requires very little behavioral change from the person being treated. He or she merely submits to the doctor’s treatment and is said to be cured.

To heal means to change the underlying condition that either created the illness in the first place, or support its continued presence. The vast majority of the illnesses that afflict and kill people today take a long time to create and finally present symptoms and signs. Heart disease, the common cancers, adult-onset diabetes (type 2), high blood pressure, digestive disorders, and forms of arthritis are usually the consequence of long-standing behaviors, such as dietary practices, cigarette smoking, lack of exercise, stress, and other behaviors that destroy health. These behaviors create the conditions for illness and support its life.

To heal means to reduce or eliminate the conditions that support disease and replace those conditions with those that create and support health.

When a doctor tells a patient that there is no cure, it means that there is no treatment that the doctor can administer to eliminate the illness. It does not mean that the person cannot be healed. There is no cure for heart disease, for example, but we all know that a person with heart disease can be fully healed and the illness eliminated from the body. To be healed, the patient himself must change his behavior.

Healing is more often the domain of competent complementary healers, while curing is the domain of medical doctors. Depending on the situation, both approaches may be necessary. In many instances, each approach is enhanced by embracing the other.